Growing up I had a pretty good relationship with my grandma. She’s my dads mom. Me and my siblings would spend weekends and holidays at her house. I always thought that was part of the divorce agreement. Some of my best memories when I was a kid are from her. Mardi Gras weekend at her house. Camping. She even took us to Disney world once. Sound of Music, Dirty Dancing and Grumpy Old Men. But I also remember her taking us to get our back to school haircuts, clothes shopping and even giving my mom a makeshift child support check because my dad never did. It wasn’t much but she did not have to do that but it definitely helped us.
Me moving in with her was never part of a plan. It just happened. Me and my roommates were dispersing and she had an extra bedroom. My family moved her to Raceland so she could be closer to family and get her out of the city. She was living in a two story house in New Orleans by herself. My dad was living with him when he became sick but once he passed we noticed she wasn’t herself. It seemed like his death accelerated her Alzheimer’s. So when the house around the corner from my uncle was for sale, he bought it for her. That was over 5 years ago.
I watched my grandma open every cabinet and drawer looking for the trash can. She couldn’t find the trash can so she just left her trash by the sink. She had just empty her plate in the trash can not even 2 minutes before. And later tonight she will throw something away properly in the trash can.
Alzheimer’s doesn’t make sense. How can she remember something from 60 years ago but not last week. Or even 2 minutes ago.
It’s been interesting to say the least watching this disease attack her brain and turn her into something she is not. When I got home from work the sitter told me that it was a bad day. Which I could tell because the second I walked in the house I could hear my grandma yelling. My grandma was not a mean person. Though I can remember a few times she fussed at me and my siblings when we were younger but nothing like I hear when I walk in the door. Usually it takes me about an hour to calm my grandma down and get her to forget about the sitter.
Honestly I don’t know who Alzheimer’s is worse on, the person it is affecting or the caretakers. My uncle has been a saint retiring early to help for her but it’s taken a toll on him and myself. But where’s the line of doing what we can until we have to put her in a home? I think that line is different for each and every family and I think we are coming up to that line.
My Lagniappe Years 
I totally understand how confusing the disease of Alzheimer’s is. That disease took both of my parents. I watched as they’d become some thing they were not as well. It is so hard on the victim of that disease as well as the loved ones surrounding him or her. Adrienne, my heart goes out to you and my prayers go up to Holy God Who sees your every tear and who hears your every cry in desperation. Just love on her as long as you can. Treasure every memory and moment. Trust in the God who created her to create in you a compassion and a love like never before.
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